Its the time when i start fearing if i could make it through the day or not.

I am pretty upset.

I've been trying hard to tell myself i can get through the day, and the next and the next. I've been doubting if i can even go through the semester. And yet... the only words i get from others is how to do this, how to do that, have you done this, have you done that... when i can't even convince myself that i can make it through today or even tho whole semester. Let alone finish all the assignments. Huhuuu. Sometimes, when you can't offer a little soothing word, a little space would do.

I did shed a tear or more. Can't help it anymore. I can't stop thinking about this and that and that. Seriously, i've been a very very bad student neglecting, procrastinating (well i've always done that though) but sigh..in the end, i hope i pass all my subjects this semester. Amin.


Current place: With ummi UBD buat report. It rained for both of us today.


='(

We fear what we don't know.

One of the other reasons why i respect Dan Brown and Paolo Coelho, both integrate spiritual knowledge in their books, without forgetting to respect other religion. Read The Lost Symbol and you'll see what i mean. Somehow, we seem to be reminded about our own Lost symbol. Yes. I finished it =p

I'll be volunteering again with Fen today at the Asean Food Conference. I find it somehow interesting that all these professionals (who are atleast at masters degree level) gather and talked about food safety and how to increase food yield. Its somehow the science part of supporting global sustanaibility and hence, the MDG goal of reducing hunger by half, may actually be achieved!

We had lizard dissection last time which i know i have done terribly but since Dr C said it was better than the last one, so i guess, that'll do. I was nervous, duuh, i had a immense fear of lizard. But on the way to the lab early in the morning, i remembered what they taught us in lestari, We fear what we don't know. And so i told my self just that. The lizard is a creature, with somehow bautiful internal organs, but we just don't know. So i think, i have come face to face (almost kissed it because i was too focused on tracing the veins and arteries) with my fear. Ofcourse, at first we used latex gloves, we sorta lose that since drawing while wearing gloves is difficult. Next dissection, Rat.

My aim this semester is to start atleast reading something for the exam, One month before the exam. It is ambitious but with the terrible work i have done for my coursework, its the only thing sane to do. So please help me remind me this.


Lastly, 25cents can feed a child, and that is lesss than a cup of coffee. So feed a child. go to..

Ps- Oh and the donation to Phillipines victim fund and Indonesia earthquake was opened, few weeks ago. Please do donate.And remember the unfortunate.

Salam. With Love. Atiqah Rad.

A billion for a billion.

This is powerful! Check here for the statistics and see how many children has probably succumbed to death by hunger.





A billion for a billion. You can fill the red cup too.

You know you see me with my body moving out of control

Gimme music, now I need it
Gotta loose it, wanna move it
Faster, louder, keep it going all night
I can take you to the limit
Move it how I like
Bodies poppin' never stopping
Feelin' free like I'm alive
I become a wild thing (yeah uh huh) i know that
I become a wild thing (yeah uh huh) so what?
This music makes my heart sing (yeah uh huh) you know that
I become a wild thing (uh oh oh)

I know you see me with my body moving out of control
I know you see me, don't you know that I got body control
This beats electric baby, shockin me right down to my soul
I know you see me I got b-b-body control
(I got body control, I-I I said I got body control)

I can move my body, body
You know I like to party
Tell the DJ girls are ready leave that beat to drop
I can take it to the limit move it how I like
Bodies poppin' never stopping
Feelin' free like I'm alive
I become a wild thing (yeah uh huh) i know that
I become a wild thing (yeah uh huh) so what?
This music makes my heart sing (yeah uh huh) you know that
I become a wild thing (uh oh oh)

I know you see me with my body moving out of control
I know you see me, don't you know that I got body control
This beats electric baby, shockin me right down to my soul
I know you see me I got b-b-body control (2x)
(I got body control, I-I I said I got body control)

Give me a minute
I'm on a mission so listen
I got the fire, I'm wild
I never tired, don't stop
No I never slow down whether you like it or not
I'm gonna shut down the spot
I'm taking over the top

I know you see me with my body moving out of control
I know you see me, don't you know that I got body control
This beats electric baby, shockin me right down to my soul

I know you see me I got b-b-body control (2X)
(I got body control, I-I I said I got body control)


xoxo.
leigton meester music fangirl.

Evacuate the dance floor!

Makes you wanna dance!



Love it.

Living with meaning.

To live in a world without becoming aware of the meaning of the world is like wandering in a great library without touching the books. The secret teaching of all ages. - first few pages of Dan Brown new The lost symbol

The first proper fiction book, i've ever finished reading, at my own will, was The Da vinci code. Well, the book's not entirely fiction, a lot of facts are integrated but that is why i love Dan Brown, regardless of how controversial he is. My other favourite was Paulo Coelho. He writes some serious philosophical writings in his fiction- so NOT entirely fiction. They inspire me. Yes, I've started The Lost Symbol. The book started with the quote above... it already sticks to my mind.


Today, on a friday, after Animal Phylo class, i wandered around the library (that is after paying 1.80 for overdue books). I flipped through an insect book which i remembered Dr marshall brought to Patoi and saw some pretty insects. So it crossed my mind that, the more you study life sciences, you learn to appreaciate and be thankful to God a lot more than you do now. medical people may study about human. But we the biological sciences study about every living thing on earth- plants and animals alike.


And then, there are more, like beautiful insects with you've never seen before, to birds feathers where every minute hooks are responsible for its flight, to plants which had been beautifully architected. There are more to life than what we've seen. Yet, our world seems to revolve solely around humans. Why can't human close their eyes and see, we are not the supreme being on earth. We are just like any other animal, God's creation. They say cloning is a serious ethical issue. But its just an issue we create. Humans can never play God. Humans may have architected more than a few beautiful buildings or invent brilliant stuffs, but can never think about placing vascular systems at precice points on a plant or correct vessels, if it had not been created before.


I guess, we all still are ignorant about the knowledge the books in our great library- the earth- held.


so thankgod, for knowledge. Happy world food day and lets reduce poverty. =) happy birthday sahlan!

I've strayed

Don't ask me where i've been. I guess i've strayed from my path. Seriously, i haven't tasted satisfaction this semester. I can't help wondering what the end result would be. People say everyone has potential, i've heard that for years... being reminded over and over, sometimes not so nicely.


But still.... perfection is far from grasp. It should be. But why is satisfaction so hard to get now?



We even have class tommorow. And its friday. Right now its 7.02pm and i'm in UBD with Ummi. HIGH. Non stop laughing pasal meliat lukisan shark kami yang cali sulnya.
We finished practical at 6 just now and had out presentation since 8am this morning. I guess this is our way to try and not regret our mistakes. Looking silly, doing silly things- or as you can say.. looking as if we have got no discipline at all.




I am going for the ochestra concert again this year. The usual nbt ochestra. I guess, its now tradition i make for myself. The difference is this time, i'll be going with fen and its going to cost extra than the previous years. Never mind. All will go to charity anyway. So do come. I can assure you, every NBT concert is like an escapade from worries. But i still think sean ghazi was the best solo invited hahaha This year, the orchestra will be Prague Chamber Orchestra.



LESS than a month to settle down! Loves T.

Extension of Planting your own tree.

UVC blog will be opened soon (i think) Hehe. They are working on the layout and so. Buuuut regarding the tree replanting, here is the message from Bazi (head of exco HSE)

Salam and hi,To everyone who is still deciding upon adopting a tree or not, good news, the period of decision-making is extended till the 26th of October 2009. The tree-planting event will take place on the 28th of October 2009, insyaAllah. Do contact me at be_riesa@hotmail.com for any doubts regarding registration and do acknowledge the idea that you can bring in your family members to contribute as well as long as the total payment for each tree is $40 and the number of people in one group is 4 or less. For an association or a club, you can adopt a tree for the latter, but the name that will be put on the label would be the association/club's name only. Any further doubts, do email me or facebook me, or for those who knows my number do text me. The forms are available at the PMUBD Shoppe and the PMUBD Office.

Loves T. =)

Baby steps to green university.

UBD's really raising its game. Perhaps this should teach the people who posted bad things about UBD on brudirect a few things. UBD going green.


Plant your own tree. Its $40 per plant, i know its expensive for some but you can buy it in groups of 4. Its long term you know so why not? I read in some book, "One wants to leave this world a little better than when one was born" The tree's yours, with your name on it and you contributed to the world. And 10 years from now, when you are having your own career, bearing your own children, you can visit that place and remenisce about it.

The form is at pmubd.

Last Wednesday, we volunteered for selection of saplings for the replanting. Who knew, UBD has a nursery of our own though its small. This will be done every wednesday i heard. =) So people, sign up for UVC.

From PMUBD

UVC first activity, a short one -registration and icebreaking and recycling. I am sure you have stacks of news papers, past year papers =p used papers, magazines, tin cans, plastic bottle at home.. So bring it to the our drop off point the ATM.

OH and next week they'll be Raya celebration at HEP place dapan the PMUBD shop and UBD got talent. If last time magician won, i wonder who will this year. Now peifen is bragging about her talent to speak loudly. HAHA. Becareful fen, you might just ended up doing talentshow thanks to us. AND BJ too. JOIN please.


Loves T.

Sometimes we tend to speed off track editted.

Sometimes we speed off track, just because we are too passionate with what we are doing. I understand so just a gentle reminder to everyone i know..

One doesn't lead by ordering others what to do or by doing it oneself. One leads when one understands that there's a team that one can cooperate with.

My blog is almost dead but i know some friends who are overseas but not to dissapoint you, i brought my lappy almost everyday now since there is no internet at home but there is internet at UBD. I'll blog once i a while but if you really want to know what i am up to... read others blog or uvcvolunteers.blogspot.com. (its still under construction so SZ privatised it)

To people who are overseas, Uk, China, New zealand anywhere, we the UBDians are proud of our Dj Ben!! So now you can be too... listen to Dj Ben online UBDfm Tune in to 107.9fm go to http://etc.ucoz.com to listen to Ben live!


Many events are up for this october. Green project is coming. So does raya festival, UBD's got talent and Pesta Convo, Kursus kepimpinan lead by exco KEPAL and not to mention the little baby steps of our UBD's Voluntary and Charity Club. So lets cooperate, shall we?


Loves T.

3 over 10 day.

You if you ask me what date it is, i have no idea. I know what i have to do the day after any day, not by counting days, but by counting practicals and when the report is due. Bause it seems like,most of my time is spent doing just that! One month and a half is not that far away. Before we know it, it'll be exam week.


Note to self: Study animal by hard!


I just can't seem to put any hope on my practicals and course works for animal. Huhu. Todays shark dissection was very upsetting. Only 2 passed today's dissection, and i am not one of them. Need to try to atleast get marks for next dissection: lizard. I heard from some seniors that sometimes, when you cut the lizard open, you can see its heart beating (because its freshly caught and kena pengsan kan saja) Oh and reminder to genetics students, yes we do have genetics practical this week.



So people...how did your week go?

60th years after the founding of republic.

Happy founding anniversary People's Republic of China!

I know its not my country but i have been reading about China, since the day i brought story's on its dynasties until the last emperor pu yi. The revolution led by Mao tse tung The rise of Maoism. The manipulation of Madam Mao. Rape of nanking was another moving story. Jiabiangou made you feel that a lot of people's lives were sacrificed during the communist revolution. The series of revolution and great leap forward which ironically, was a bomb to China's economy. Deng Xiao peng, the one who opened china's door and boost their economy.

All made me think, Mao was like the stalin, or the hitler of asia. No offence on my opinion of their similarities, but all of them managed to instill fear to billions of his people and the whole country bowed to his command. It was a terrible time, i read. Sufferings, its what history writes. And yet after 60 years, the once great ruler is still remembered. Great people throughout history have been born in china. Bad things have happened. Greats things have happened and its just the beginning i guess.



Happy founding day nevertheless.


Ps- No offence yeah. I have my thoughts on Mao. Until now i still think of how did he manage to make the whole country bow to his administration. How did he make billions believed in him. He's not higher education educated and yet, he managed to brilliantly make China, the people's republic of china. It keeps on playing in my mind. Just like why did people let Idi Amin rule and grow mad until he became a cannibal. Huhu. Who's idi amin? Read yourself.

Btw i am moving on to India's history next. KALI. =p (because i found a book di best eastern yang macam siuk. NON fiction jua =p) HAHA balikan.